I have wintered hard during the pandemic and in all its reverbs. This has given me the gift of slowing down, nurturing myself and my family with a depth I’ve never managed before, and seeing the oppressive system I have contributed to in the name of education. Going slow has allowed me to gain insight and clarity around how I want to interact with my community going forward.
I have been a teacher for the last 15 years. I have worked in all facets of education, from pre-K and elementary to adult learners. I have had the fortune to share my gifts with thousands of individuals. And for the most part, I have loved it. I have grown as an educator, learner, and community member. I have stood up for what I believe in and lost my dream job after speaking truth to power. I have stumbled, been called in, and had community support in a way I’ve never knew existed.
All the while thinking that if I continued to live my truth and be an out and proud advocate for intentional racial equity inclusion education and a Restorative Justice practitioner, I could work and make change in a broken system.
Over the past 7 years, I’ve seen my district, the largest in Oregon, systematically dismantle the very departments they continue to tout as fundamental. For example, our racial equity department was gutted, leaving brilliant Black women to bring their gifts to neighboring districts.
This last year, when Oregon returned to full-time in-person learning in the fall, teachers were left again to scramble and attempt to resuscitate a broken shell of a system. We were left trying to manage extremely violent behaviors from dysregulated students, act as mental health providers to help students cope with ongoing trauma, and shuffle around the building to act as substitute teachers because of a teacher shortage.
Despite having a SURPLUS of money, if this wasn’t enough of an untenable situation, the district announced classroom teacher cuts for the next school year. Our union members have spent countless hours attempting to reason with unreasonable district “leaders.”
I am stretched so thin and beyond burned out so I am tapping out. For my health, for my family, for my love of teaching.
I will continue to advocate for what I believe in. I will continue to be an equity-centered teacher. I will continue to bring my gifts to my students. But, I will do it on my own terms, intentionally.
Soon, I will be offering online continued education for restorative teaching practices. I am creating content that will be equitable and inclusive. This is my way to continue to serve my community with my ancestral practices and be the fullest expression of who I am.
So I hope you will join me in saying yes to going slow, what feels right, and continuing to fight for our historically marginalized students. We all do better when we are better.
Let’s create a stronger community, one circle at a time!
In solidarity and with gratitude,
Erin
This post was created on the Oregon Tribal Lands of the Cowlitz, Confederated Tribes of Grand Ronde, Clackamas, and many other tribes who made their home along the Columbia River.
I take this opportunity to thank the original caretakers of this land, and my elders on my ancestral land of the Blackfoot tribe.